I’m not re-reading very much of what I’ve told people about my relationship this past week, because I don’t want to slide backwards into that frame of mind again ~ so I’m not sure what I told you all and what I didn’t.
My long distance relationship has ended, officially and for what looks like forever. He is and will always remain my best friend, the support system to remind me there’s hope outside of Godawful-Georgia,
but he’s not my boyfriend anymore, and I’ve been coming to terms with that for the days I’ve been absent.
As an answer to the questions I’ve been getting about why we broke up, I don’t have an easy, simple answer for you; in short: We both need to grow - a lot. Both of us, him especially, don’t know what the fuck we want out of life, and what kind of adults we really want to grow into. And, for reasons personal to us and nearly impossible to explain on paper, we cannot do so in a relationship with one another.
So that’s it, I guess. It’s morbidly amusing that my LDR didn’t end because of the distance. The distance, in a way, made us a lot stronger, closer than we might possibly have ever been living down the street from one another.
I still have hope for every one of you that follow me, and of course for those of you who don’t, that your relationship has as good a chance as any to work out beautifully. Keep your patience steady, your heart light, and your spirits high, because it’s worth it.
Love is blissful and, at its peak, the single most important thing that can ever happen to you. It can hurt sometimes, bite and sting at your heart, and in the end sometimes it’s not enough to keep two people together.
But I keep my faith in love; through all the tears and sadness, nothing has damped my passion for finding someone who can love me unconditionally, and truthfully.
This isn’t goodbye, I might return to this blog for support, my archive or even to remember one day when it doesn’t hurt so bad. But for now, I have to let it go - let myself breathe again, I love you all.